23 Comments

As someone who recently surrendered to need for a 9 to 5 for financial reasons and is consequently blaming it for my lack of consistent writing, this is exactly what I needed to hear. Incredibly helpful advice. I will be printing this article (using my office printer, ha!) and referencing it on days I feel stuck.

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I'm so glad it was helpful! Thanks for commenting!

And yes, the hidden bonus of the 9-5 office job--access to office supplies. Print all the things at work and while you're at it, maybe nab a few pens. :)

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Absolutely….it so often isn’t the one thing…it’s all the things. All the itty bitty things that fill up the moments and suck the energy right out of you. And the perceptions we have placed on ‘being worthy’. Thanks for another good read Sonal!

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Death by a thousand cuts. Or maybe more like being crushed by a million pebbles.

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I love all of this so much! Such brilliant, human, empathetic, and practical advice. So much productivity advice comes from people who are either neurotypical, or are probably not neurotypical but actually atypical in their ability to crank things out. This on the other hand is advice we can actually use, and feel better about ourselves along the way. Thank you!

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Thanks for commenting. And yes, productivity advice. I have tried following so much productivity advice in the past in an attempt to actually make writing happen, and then blamed myself when it didn't work. Turns out, a lot of it wasn't good advice for creative work, and even more of it didn't work with my brain.

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100%. So much of the advice assumes you need to figure out what to do and then boils down to "just do it." Um, thanks Nike. The one source I like who has ADHD himself and actually gets it is David Cain who has a website called Raptitude. He's a good writer (also not common in productivity gurus) and gives advice grounded in understanding the struggle.

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So glad to catch up on this, Sonal. I always enjoy your tone + smart advice + a few LOLs (thanks for the dopamine hit - yay). After our MFA, five of us formed a monthly workshop group, which has been critical. Two of us submit pages every other month, so there's time in between to revise or start something new. I started another similar group w/ 3 other women from our program (not my cohort). If I didn't have these monthly deadlines, I would not be writing, period. The only time of day that really works for me is at o-dark-thirty. Even with all that, instead of writing, it's too easy just to watch late night shows on YouTube or play the NYT word games or read on Substack. It's so hard to keep that momentum -- too many distractions.

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It's genuinely hard, and even with all the systems we put in place to keep things going... I mean, sleep or late night videos or writing. Some of these are much easier than others. But there's nothing for it except to keep on swimming

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Yup. I make a point of reveling in the amazing feeling of finishing a story revision. So I can remind myself next time I procrastinate.

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..."there are few rewards that I have to wait for that can outweigh the pleasure of immediately goofing off"...you ate the marshmellow, didn't you? :)

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I can wait on the marshmallow, no problem. But my phone? Connected to the internet?

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😂

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👏 This is everything! Was nodding along the whole way. Another great piece of writing advice (and I'm realllllly picky about writing advice lol)

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Me too! Thanks Jade!

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There are a lot of good thoughts in your response, Sonal. I'd like to highlight a few things. None of them are writing hints. To me it feels like Questioner has a hole to climb out of.

It sounds like Questioner needs to re-assess their priorities and ask if the world will go on in an OK state (no need to be perfect) if some things just don't get done. It's hard to say just what things those would be without a long convo, but Questioner sounds a bit overwhelmed. Is there a spouse/significant other/close friend who can help with home stuff, things like that. Are the kids old enough to start making their own meals? Etc.

Pursuing an activity that is neither a chore nor writing may be a big help. Exercise works for me, it can clear the mind and gives a dopamine hit. One needs to pick something they enjoy though, exercise just for the sake of exercise becomes another boring chore.

As for the soul-sucking day job, what I have observed over the years is that some people in that boat either are not well-matched to the job requirements or have a conflict with the specific business culture they are in. Can Questioner imagine adequately-paying employment that is not soul-sucking? Maybe not, but it needs to be asked. Questioner's strong dislike of their job may be dragging them down both at work and at home, and hence there is no creative energy left for writing.

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Yes, there's a lot of figuring out and life-shifting around to do. None of which is necessarily easy, although the tricky bit is knowing what is impossible and what just seems impossible.... all of which is extra hard when you're overwhelmed.

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I don't have a soul sucking day job, but when I need to force myself, I pick small goals. I will write a couple poems, or 500 words. And I try to do it as often as possible. And the writing slowly starts to add up!

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Small goals are an excellent idea. As small as it needs to be to be achievable.

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Excellent advice, Sonal. Even as a middle-aged dude with no kids and a non-corporate full-time job, the struggle was oh so relatable. I do find today’s world to be more challenging, with social media and the ability to distract oneself with everything streaming. Attention requires intention. Meditation and yoga helped me see the importance of having a clear intention (I do it daily.).

I see writing as a practice. Like playing an instrument. If I do a little bit every day, I get better, I can access the words faster, and I find I don’t need as much time to reach my writing goals. I also put post-its on my computer, little kind messages to myself that I can’t help but reread when the doubts and critical voices start to get loud.

Lastly, writing is much more than pen to paper. Driving to work? Instead of listening to NPR or music, babble into your notes app. Ideas will come. The creative juices will flow, and will seep into the rest of your day, bringing little bursts of inspiration that you can quickly add to your Notes app (or wherever). I am constantly saying “Siri, start new note in Notes App” and then writing or speaking some random bit that may end up being unusable, but that keeps the spark alive. It’s possible to use technology as a tool to help us rather than distract us.

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Oh yes.... it's not just corporate work, since I am technically unemployed and yet still struggle to write, although not being burdened with a terrible office job is definitely a blessing. Life is a lot these days.

Excellent point about writing being more than just pen to paper. I completely agree. Finding those moments to be creative amid everything else is an excellent thing.

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While she may be blessed in some ways, Liz Gilbert is in no way neurotypical. She's sometimes way too positive and sunny, and I can't deal with that.

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🤣🤣🤣 Yes, that is all kinds of intolerable.

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